Monday, August 29, 2011

Attacked

I received an email directed at a specific community I am a part of yesterday that stunned me with a venomous attack on children. I chose to exercise my new assertiveness and replied to the email, expressing my agreement and concern about the initial cause for this person to be upset. I also expressed my concern that the attack which accompanied her concern was unnecessary and over the top. In reply, I was told that one of my children was one of the horrid children, but only in my presence, when I'm not around, he's a perfect model of civility.

I'm stunned. I am choosing to not engage in an argument with her. Her perception is her perception, however it hurts. I'm struggling to not let the opinions of others affect who I am and how I approach the world, but I also tend to take out the attack, the negative feedback and closely look at it to see if it is true. Sadly, I often just assume that they are right and I must be doing something wrong. This morning I feel as if my parenting skills are grossly lacking because of this woman's shared perception.

I am insulted. I am stunned. An email about her approach to our shared community has become an attack against me and my parenting skills, also bringing into the picture my ex-husband as "he is my parenting partner". I've struggled with this person for a while, but now has come a time to make a decision. I have asked her to no longer communicate with me. I had already decided to not return to that church, she has dried the cement on that post.

It is sad that one person can permeate a room and ruin the entire experience. I am not saying she is the reason I chose not to return to that church, there is more to it than that, but she is a large part of the reason.

There is a blessing in this too. I have power over this too, in Jesus name. He has not abandoned me and He is laughing and dancing with me over this beautiful opportunity to practice my new assertiveness. :)

It's a delightful dance this morning.

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