Wednesday, September 14, 2011


I'm stressing at this very moment. I'm so frustrated!! You know how somethings in life are just out of your control? I can control my actions, my decisions, my behaviours, and ... to a large degree, my reactions to others. However, I have no control over others decisions, actions and behaviours. I have to live with it or just live without it and sometimes I have no control over WHO is in my life. Sure, I can (sometimes) restrict how often someone else is in my life, but I cannot fully eliminate some of those who I'd like to. That sounds awful.

I'm getting a handle on my life. I'm climbing out of the pit, but there are still moments when my feet slip in the dirt, when a new pit opens before me. How do I handle that? How can I keep my feet on solid ground? By keeping my eyes on Christ who WILL see me through, no matter how difficult the battle, no matter how slippery the ground.

I'm slipping right now. I feel stranded, I feel unable to provide what my children want/need and/or what I want/need. Sometimes it's a waste of my time. Other times it makes me feel inefficient, like I'm not enough for myself, or for my boys.

I am enough. This dance of life is not without its pitfalls, without its trials. I need to remember that behind every trial is a blessing, behind every storm is a rainbow. I need to remember that though I stumble and fall, the music will go on and I can just keep dancing when I get my feet back under me again.

In the meantime, it's okay to enjoy the music and envision the dance steps in my head.

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